The Last Supper
by Rikue
Summary: A fantastic drabble about the banquet thrown at Hawke estate. But with such a diverse group of friends, can things possibly go as planned? The story features M!Hawke Fenris, and mention of several other pairings. Lots of romance, drama, and humor! As always, please R&R!


Hey, guys! Just a few quick notes:

- Elena Amell is Hawke's cousin (the daughter of Mara Cousland and Gamlen Amell), she began traveling with him when his family was fleeing The Blight. A small side-scene between her and Anders is based on this comic by Mila-Valentine from DeviantArt. ( art/Years-Ago-Comic-207387373)

- Ceraphine is one of Flemeth's many daughters. She is incredibly powerful, and like her mother, her powers of perception and clairvoyance are vast.

- There is mention of some DA:O events, which bring up the elven warden Surana, who had a relationship with Alistair, as well as the noble warden Cousland. If you haven't played DA:O yet, there may be some spoilers.

- Since my DA world features both a Mage and Rogue protagonist I decided to keep both Carver and Bethany alive. When it comes to characters, the more the merrier, right?

- There is mention of Gay/Bi/Lesbian/Straight relationships all over the place, so please follow the golden rule of fanfiction: if you don't like it don't read it!

Thanks, that's all!

* * *

One of Hawke's favorite things about Merrill was her excitability, and he greatly wished he could have been there to see her reaction when the messenger delivered an invitation to her in the Low Town markets.

She had practically screamed and jumped for joy, as the invitation was to Hawke's estate for a dinner with friends. Her next thought was what to wear, of course. She certainly wouldn't arrive in her usual garments. She was going to High Town!

Fenris' response was not quite so enthusiastic. The messenger had come to his door and read the invitation aloud to him, as per Hawke's request. At once he was reminded of his last gathering with Danarius. The elf had half a mind not to go at all, but something written on the back of the card changed his mind. He'd been practicing reading with Hawke in the evenings, and was still unable to recognize most words, but the phrase "please come" was simple enough.

A sigh escaped his lips. The messenger had said "formal". He imagined his warrior skins would not be sufficient. Then his mind drifted into a scenario. What would Hawke do if he did show up in his usual armor? He imagined the man dragging him upstairs to redress him. Hawke would begin unlatching his breastplate, slowly working his fingers lower until… There was a noise down the hall and he jumped, then scolded himself for entertaining such a stupid idea. Since his return, he'd noticed a change in Hawke's disposition when Anders was around, and the mage had always sort of fawned over him. If for no other reason, he had to attend just to keep them apart.

Anders had just finished another draft for his manifesto when his invitation arrived. He took a moment to admire the wax seal on the front, which bore the Amell coat of arms. He glanced around to check that he was alone before pressing the envelope to his lips. He knew Hawke had written and sealed it himself, because the scent of warm cinnamon still lingered on the paper. After holding his breath for a moment he exhaled and flipped the tab open with his thumb.

Isabela had just collected her winnings from yet another suckered patron of The Hanged Man, and was already looking for another fool to victimize when her message came. She chuckled to herself when she noticed how nervous the courier looked, being in such a disreputable part of town. She read the message as he traveled up the stairs to deliver one to Varric, and upon his return she kissed the paper, leaving a glossy print of lipstick on its surface, and returned it to him.

"Tell him I'll be there." She winked, reveling in the fact that the gesture made the boy blush, "And ask him if my birthday suit counts as 'formal'."

He nodded hastily and tripped backwards over a chair before scurrying out the door.

"Formal?" She muttered into her drink, "Who in the bloody hell does he think I am?"

The last person to receive an invitation was Elena. She'd been perched on the window sill of Gamlen's hovel in Low Town, sketching a blue bird when the courier came. She opened the letter eagerly and chuckled to herself, knowing that she would have to force a few of her companions into finer clothes. Isabela and Fenris would require the most assistance. And she thought to go to them, but hesitated as a thought presented itself. Hawke never threw parties. He absolutely despised them. And even if he'd managed to talk his mother out of inviting the Reinhardts' daughter, he wouldn't collect them at his estate without a reason.

Or perhaps she was just being cynical. On the bottom of the letter, Hawke had told her that Gamlen was welcome as well, though they both knew he wouldn't come on his own. Perhaps he could be persuaded.

Now she would have to pick up something for him as well. She rolled her eyes and set out to find Isabela first.

The night of the feast came quickly, and people began to arrive as soon as the sun set. Merrill was the first, as Hawke expected, wearing a lovely white, green, and gold robe that wrapped gently around her thin figure. He introduced her to his servant Orana, and watched for a moment to see if they would click the way he'd hoped. Turns out they were both born of Dalish origin, and Orana had more than a few questions about her people's history- which was something Merrill could prattle on for hours about.

Next came Aveline, on Donnic's arm. They were both dressed in finery, which made Hawke grin, as he'd never seen her out of her armor before. Her fiery hair was pulled up neatly, and she wore a strikingly fine red dress with gold trim and embellishments.

"Aveline, I…" Hawke chuckled, "You look absolutely stunning."

"Oh you don't have to coddle me." She rolled her eyes, "I look silly, I know it."

Hawke glanced at Donnic, who replied, "She won't believe me either, and I had to agree to babysit the new recruits for a month just to get her into it."

"It was worth it." Hawke grinned.

"Oh, without a doubt." He pressed his lips against her temple and she blushed furiously.

"Oh, dear, there's Leandra!" She beamed, "I haven't spoken to her in a month, so I should definitely…"

"Definitely." Donnic laughed, and she darted off. The guard then turned his gaze to Hawke, and remarked, "I swear, you'd think she showed up naked, for all the fussing she's done."

After a hearty laugh and a few more exchanged pleasantries Hawke dismissed himself to greet the rest of his arriving guests.

Sebastian appeared just as Hawke reached the threshold, wearing a set of Starkhaven regalia, cinched at the waist with his usual belt.

"Thanks for coming." Hawke smiled at him.

"It's my pleasure." Sebastian nodded.

The prince greeted Leandra and Aveline before making his way to Donnic, which ignited a tri-point discussion of city-politics and the Maker's stance on vigilante justice.

When Hawke turned around he saw Ceraphine waiting in the doorway. Her body was practically dripping in white woven fabric, with a massive, snow-fur collar. The silver mail draped around her waist reflected the light of the room, causing her look like something like a candle. It was brilliant.

After a greeting from Hawke, the witch made her way to the corner, where a band of musicians had gathered to play quietly. She seemed mesmerized by them until Merrill came to speak with her.

Elena and Gamlen were next. He walked in without an introduction, but Elena paused in the door way, looking behind her as though she were waiting for something. Sure enough, Isabela strode in beside her, and Hawke's jaw nearly hit the floor.

Isabela's dress was blue and gold, trailing to the floor with a slit that towered up to her waist. She almost never wore underwear, he knew, but it was so long in the front that no one would notice regardless. Her waist was wrapped tight with a gold fabric that climbed up and over her shoulders, and cascaded down her back like water. Even her hair was pulled back with a sculpted golden clip.

"I had half a mind to show up naked." She laughed, "But then Elena found this little number, and I said 'oh, what the hell?'"

The girl next to her, his cousin, was equally adorned with fabric. Her dress was far simpler than the rogue's, probably because she didn't want to outshine her date, but it was stunning nonetheless. The fabric was a deep emerald green that brought out her eyes, and the light tattoo on her cheek.

"Isabela just… Do me a favor and don't say anything… vulgar in front of my mother."

"He's serious. You'd think she's depraved and all, but I guarantee you, she knows exactly what you mean when you talk about 'hoisting the main sail'." Elena warned her.

"Alright, alright, I wouldn't want to embarrass you in front of your mum'" She pinched his cheek and took off into the main room, with Elena following close behind. He watched them for a moment.

"That's going to be trouble." Hawke looked forward, then down, to see Varric looking past him. When their gaze met, Varric added, "I didn't think it was possible, but she managed to make her arse look even bigger in that dress."

"The women of Kirkwall would be wise to keep their men close. And vice versa." Hawke mused, "Maker knows she'll break hearts tonight." He then added, "Varric… Isabela looks like a lady, and even Aveline's donning a dress for this, couldn't you have found something else to wear for the occasion?"

"Hawke, you wound me." Varric smiled, "I bought a new belt buckle just this morning!" He laughed at his own joke and then remarked, "Besides, with the stories I'm going to tell about you no one will even notice."

"Just try not to worry my mother." He said, "And I've told you, she doesn't know about-"

"I know, I know." Varric waved him away and shuffled off to join the party.

He'd gathered a small crowd now, as Carver finally made it down stairs. He'd managed to weasel his way out of staying at the barracks for a week, just in time for Hawke's party.

They acknowledged each other with a nod, and Carver went to speak with Merrill and Cera.

Hawke went outside and leaned against the exterior wall. He was looking at the stars when he heard the shuffling of footsteps to his right. There was a figure moving through the shadows against the wall, looking exceptionally suspicious. Apparently the resident guard thought he looked suspicious as well, because the knight called out to him.

The shadow froze, and Hawke decided to rescue him before things got out of hand.

"Cousin! Thank the Maker you made it! I was afraid you'd be late!" He went to the figure and grasped his shoulder.

"Oh, this man is a guest of yours, Serah Hawke?" The guard quipped, "My apologies!"

"No, certainly you were only doing your job." Hawke smiled at the man, "And my cousin does have a way of lurking about."

"As you say, messere." The guard nodded and withdrew himself, "Have a good evening."

Hawke ushered the mage inside and placed both hands firmly on his shoulders. Anders removed his hood to reveal a face pale with fear. Noah slid a hand off his shoulder, and down to his chest. His heart was nearly beating out of his chest.

"It's alright, you're safe now." Hawkes words soothed him, "Not that you were in any danger. I'm sure that guard was far more afraid of you than you are of him, looming in the shadows like something out of a horror story."

"I try to avoid being seen." Anders explained.

"Sometimes it's best to hide in plain sight." He told him, "Looking like you've got something to hide only makes you a greater target."

Anders nodded, and Hawke pulled back.

"Almost everyone is here now." He said, "But if you're looking for company, I'd try Varric."

The healer started off but Hawke called to him.

"Anders" The mage spun on his heel and found the man eyeing him curiously, until he flashed a smile and said, "The new coat looks good on you."

"Thanks, Hawke." The mage gave a weak smile before disappearing into the main hall.

Hawke went to go outside again and nearly ran into Fenris as he entered.

His first instinct was to greet the elf with a quick kiss, but he stifled it. Things hadn't been the same since he'd returned, as one would expect after being abandoned by his bedside.

"I didn't think you'd come." Hawke smiled, he looked the elf over and inhaled slowly as he took in the sight of the robe he was wearing, "It's… absolutely regal, Fenris. You look…" He couldn't find the words to finish his sentence, instead running his fingers over the fabric, which was black, and gold, and ivory-velvety to the touch.

"I thought it was too much, but… Elena said you'd like it."

"I do. I love it actually." He shook his head slowly, still fingering the trim. The only thing better would be taking it off, but surely he couldn't do so now. Perhaps after everyone had gone, if it went well? Maker, he hoped it would.

"Hawke… I wanted to tell you." The mage lifted his gaze, and as he did he saw someone approaching over Fenris' shoulder, and it took him a moment before he realized who it was.

"Bethany?" He moved past Fenris and stepped outside. She stood there in earnest, and a smile spread over her face when she saw him.

"I sent you an invitation but I never thought you'd be able to come!"

"We weren't so far from Kirkwall when the letter came, and the Commander saw me read it." His sister shrugged, "She said it'd be a waste not to come" Then added, "Though I'm sorry I couldn't find anything better to wear, if I'd stopped to shop around I never would have made it on time."

"You could be wearing a Darkspawn's hide for all I care." He embraced her firmly, and she hugged him back. Fenris watched them from the door, and smiled to himself. Seeing Hawke like this… It made him happy. They would have plenty of time to speak privately later. He stepped backward silently and made his way into the main hall.

"We have to get you to mother." He told Bethany, "She'll be absolutely thrilled!"

The room lit up when she walked in, and as he expected, his mother burst into tears at the sight of her. After a moment of wailing like any mother would, Leandra excused herself to freshen up, and Bethany followed her eagerly.

When they returned, she'd put Bethany in one of her old dresses, and Hawke was happy to see that it fit her perfectly. She looked like her mother so much, whereas he looked like his father.

A moment later, everyone was seated in the dining hall, and the servants were placing the food, which was a feast fit for a king; Lobsters, steaks, and breads and cheeses from across the region. They'd even managed to order a traditional Starkhaven quiche, which Sebastian raved about, saying that it tasted just like the ones he had as a child.

Hawke gave a speech about good friends and good food, and Varric launched into his first story which, to his relief, had nothing to do with him. It was about the old Grey Warden fortress called Vigil's Keep, and how dwarves had rebuilt it so well, that it withstood an invasion from a full Darkspawn horde.

"I was there." Anders interjected, "And I can assure you, he's making it much bigger than it actually is."

Everyone laughed, knowing that Varric had a tendency to embellish the truth a bit.

"And the Commander of The Gray he keeps referring to is also quite well known as The Hero of Fereldan." He smiled, "She's a dear friend of mine, the one who inducted me into the Wardens as a matter of fact."

"What?" Bethany choked on her wine, "The Commander? I've been with her for a month now, do you honestly think she's the one they tell stories about?"

"Sure is, and they're all true." Anders smiled, "How did you come across her?"

"The Captain took us to meet with her, and we showed up right when she was meeting with the King." She shrugged, then smiled playfully "I might be wrong, but I think he's sweet on her."

"The Captain?" Anders raised a brow.

"No, King Alistair." She told him, "He's a good man."

"Well I'll be damned." Anders said breathlessly, "She used to tell us stories about someone called Alistair, I never thought she meant the King. Apparently they were the Wardens who survived Ostagar. They took on the Blight together."

"Ostagar?" Aveline chimed in, "I thought all the wardens died there?"

"No," Anders couldn't swallow his wine quick enough, "The old King's general, Ser Loghain betrayed them. He was supposed to send his army in, but when the command came he retreated."

"I had heard whispers." Aveline shook her head, "But now… I actually believe them."

"This is crazy." Elena chuckled, "My cousin Gale joined the Wardens at the same time she did. Does everyone know of her in some way?"

"Your cousin?" Gamlen raised a brow at her, "What cousin?"

"Well, mother was a Cousland before you married her, right?" She smiled, "Her sister's family ruled Highever, and we visited them often." She chuckled for a moment, "I practically grew up with him."

"Highever…" Gamlen thought for a moment, "Yes, I suppose that's right. Where is he now?"

"I wish I knew." Elena sighed, "His family was murdered by Rendon Howe when the Blight first began. I was there when it happened. He was the only one to survive it, and he gave up his name when he became a Warden." She paused, "I… don't think he wanted anyone to know who he was."

"Why not?" Leandra said, "I remember your mother, and her sister. It was a long time ago, but… Her son could have been the Lord of Highever!"

"I suppose, but…" She smiled weakly, "In his last letter he told me he gave it all up to be with the person he loved."

"How times have changed." Leandra sighed, "I almost said he was foolish, but then I realized… I know exactly what that's like."

She thought on it for a moment, twirling some pasta around her fork.

"Well, the Commander did save us from the Blight." Merrill shrugged, "So I suppose we all know her somehow."

"My sister traveled with her, and Alistair." Ceraphine said thoughtfully, as she pushed some food around on her plate.

"Your sister?" Hawke raised a brow, "Is that… Your mother mentioned a daughter when we delivered her amulet to Sundermount."

"Yes, a girl named Morrigan." Merrill said, "I know of her. She stole a book from my clan when we were traveling."

"And we're all linked together in some way!" Varric said, "This is literary gold!"

"But what about you?" Elena asked, "You didn't know her did you?"

"Well, I knew one of the dwarves at the Keep, but I'm the narrator, Lola, I don't have to know her." Varric winked.

"I don't know her either." Sebastian shrugged, "But I've never been to Fereldan, so…"

"Nor do I." Fenris spoke rather quietly, but it was loud enough for everyone to hear.

Everyone sat eating quietly, thinking the story was at its end.

"Well… I knew her." Isabela said, then looked to Elena, "And your cousin. Gale, isn't it?" Elena's eyes widened and Isabela sighed, knowing she'd have to tell her part, "I knew them all, Alistair and Morrigan too. We'd both stayed at the same tavern for a while, in Denerim. She was traveling with a friend of mine."

"Sounds to me like her influence was far reaching." Hawke said, then he turned to Bethany, "And you met her?"

"Yeah, she's the one who told me I should come tonight." Bethany explained, "She said that a Warden's life is short, and that I should take this as an oppourtunity to be with my family while I still can."

"Sounds like her." Anders smiled, "She was… a woman like no other."

"Oh my, you had a crush on her!" Isabela chirped.

"Well... Yes, I suppose I did." Anders shrugged, "But she made it clear from the start that she wasn't available."

"So there is something between her and Alistair?" Bethany asked eagerly.

"More than you know, but... When I knew her, she said it was just history." Anders sighed, then smiled, "The best thing about her was that she didn't regard herself any higher than the rest of us, and because of that, we all grew pretty close in the few months we had." He gave a dry laugh, "She'll go to her grave knowing more about me than most people ever will, and look at how long I've known each of you." He took a bite of fish then said, "But in turn, I know things about her that the history books will never tell." Everyone was silent, as they could feel that he was finding the words for something bigger, "She… told me once that she had a daughter."

"From Alistair? How can that be? I thought the wardens lose their fertility after a while?" Hawke asked.

"We do, but… By some act of the maker, they were blessed." He sighed, "If you can call it that."

Again, everyone was quiet.

"Believe it or not, I have heard this story before." Varric spoke, "It's one of Fereldan's best kept secrets." He smiled wryly, "Did you know that King Alistair was the old King Cailan's half-brother?"

"You're joking" Aveline's eyes went wide.

"I never knew Cailan had a brother." Leandra spoke.

"Of course not, the boy was King Maric's bastard." Varric said, "And I also heard that he's the one who killed Lord Loghain, in the middle of Denerim's court because a fight broke out between the nobles."

"You're kidding." Elena quipped, with an interested gaze.

"Not even. The story goes that they arranged a duel, and after he'd avenged his brother by killing Loghain, he was put up to take the throne by one of the Arls, the one who raised him, or something like that."

"And he accepted it?" Isabela asked, "I thought he was in love with the Hero!"

"And that's grounds to deny your country?" Aveline reasoned, "He's made a fine King."

"Yes, but now the story's got a shitty ending." Isabela griped.

"Isabela…" Aveline rolled her eyes, "This is history, not some sappy love tale."

"Can't it be both?" Isabela argued, "Even if he is King, it's been almost seven years since that tavern in Denerim, and I can still remember the way he looked at her."

"Isabela, I thought you didn't believe in love?" Merrill asked teasingly.

"I do, kitten, it just isn't for me." She said, lifting her glass to her lips.

"I'm still trying to grasp the idea that she has a child." Bethany shook her head, "It seemed impossible, but… now that I think about it, everything she accomplished was." Her brow was still furrowed, and she looked to Anders, "I just wonder, if she does have a daughter, then why haven't I met her?"

"Because she's in the circle." Anders said, "If you've met the Commander, then you've seen how white her hair is, haven't you?" Bethany nodded and he continued, "Tell me Merrill, under what circumstances do you see someone with white hair?"

"Well, when they're old of course, or if they have a great deal of magic." She shrugged, "Among the Dalish, those born with white hair were guaranteed to be Keeper." Merrill explained, "I think in the days of old, every one of my kind had the white. But it's another thing that we've lost."

"That explains a few things." Hawke looked to Fenris, "I'll bet your hair wasn't white until you were branded with that lyrium. The mana probably turned it."

"And look at Cera." Elena said, "We've all seen what she can do, and her hair is white as snow."

The young witch nodded to her.

"So her girl was born with white hair?" Sebastian asked, "And that was cause enough to send her to the circle? What if they were wrong?"

"Trust me, she knew." Anders said, looking especially grim about it, "She told me that she had agreed to send her to the circle if she had magic, if not she was going to be sent to the chantry to become a Templar." He exhaled, "Keeping the child with her wasn't an option, because of the obvious danger. But sometimes I wonder…"

"Maker, that couldn't have been an easy choice." Hawke sympathized, "Do you disagree with her decision, Anders?"

"No." Anders shook his head, "I know her too well to think less of her for it." He paused sipping his wine, "She was raised in the circle you know, but… if what Merrill said it true, I can't imagine why her clan would give her up."

"If she was a city elf, it wouldn't have mattered." Carver chimed in, "You see how the elves here regard their culture."

Anders nodded, and Merrill seemed saddened by the fact.

"Still, to have a love so strong…" Bethany smiled, "They saved the world together, and gave up so much..." She sighed lovingly, "I wish I could have just a fraction of that."

"Perhaps you will someday." Donnic said, giving her hope, "If she could find love in The Grey Wardens, then maybe you can too."

"You know I wanted to be one as a child." Sebastian mused, "Seems silly now. A cleric, a prince, a huntsman, a warden."

"Why not be all of that?" Varric asked, "I heard that Alistair was raised in the chantry, and he was a prince too, but he joined the Wardens."

"That's… an interesting thought." Sebastian smiled back at him, "Maybe something to consider. I mean, by the Chantry law, I couldn't have children anyway."

"All this talk of love…" Leandra smiled, "Noah, my darling, I'll have to find you a suitable wife soon."

Elena choked on her wine, and Carver laughed under his breath, which was cause for Aveline to kick him under the table. Hawke set his gaze hard on his plate.

"A wife?" Gamlen laughed. He'd had far too much to drink, and things were going downhill fast, "He's been shagging that apostate mage at my house a few times a week, Leandra! He's as queer as a pink chicken!"

"A pink chicken?" Merrill muttered quietly, "I never knew that chickens were pink."

Hawke didn't dare look at his mother.

"Oh, Gamlen, I think you've had far too much wine." Elena said as she stood, "Perhaps we should get you home?"

"What are you afraid I'm going to tell her about you and the pirate bitch?"

"I think that's enough out of you." Elena pulled him from his chair and headed for the door.

"Thank you for inviting us this evening, Hawke." She smiled at him, "Varric, I think this would be a good time to tell that story you were telling me about."

"Of course," The dwarf smiled awkwardly, "Did I ever tell you about the time Hawke took down a whole band of Qunari outlaws with nothing more than a fork and some Elfroot?"

"Why couldn't you have just told me?" Leandra asked, and Hawke looked to see that tears were brimming under her eyes.

"And what would I have said?" Hawke exhaled, closing his eyes gently.

"You could have told me not to hope for grandchildren!" She shouted at him, "Or that I was wasting the Reinhardts time arranging meetings with their daughter, when you weren't going to show up anyway."

"Mother-"

"Or you could tell me that Gamlen's had too much to drink, that he's lying and you aren't what he says you are." Her tone was almost pleading.

"He has had too much to drink, mother." Hawke told her, "But he isn't lying."

A whimper escaped her as she left the table, asking for everyone to excuse her before she ascended the stairs to her room. As soon as she was gone Fenris pushed away from the table and stood.

"I see now that I needn't have returned." He said, and though Hawke called after him, he left without another word.

"You dirty little thing!" Isabela muttered to Anders, "Why didn't anyone tell me you two were sleeping together!?"

He ignored her outright and looked at Hawke, "I'll go after him, you should talk to your mum'"

"Anders, I don't think that's such-"

"Trust me." The healer was out the door before he could argue otherwise.

Hawke headed for the stairs, but halted, and turned back to the group and said, "I know things aren't going exactly as I'd planned, but I'd like you all to stay. Varric, could you manage things while I'm gone?"

"Of course, Hawke." His Dwarven friend nodded, and called to the servant to bring two bottles of liquor, "We're going to play a game, a drinking game, I like to call fact or fable"

Hawke was well up the stairs before he could hear the rest, though he knew it well.

Anders had called to Fenris twice with no response, but the third time he did the elf turned sharply swearing in a language he didn't recognize.

"Call me what you want, but I'm not the one running." Anders chided.

"I should tear your heart out." Fenris growled at him, but there was more hurt than anger in his tone.

"Why? Because he came to me when you fled?" Anders said, "Because I love him? Or because I fucked him?" Anders hissed sorely, "Because let me tell you something: He hasn't touched me since the night you returned, and even if he had, it wouldn't matter, because every time he allowed me close, I wasn't the one he was thinking of." The mage continued, "For all that I am, and all that I've done, it isn't enough, dammit, he will never love me the way he loves you! Why can't you see that?"

"I wish he would!" Fenris snapped.

"You don't mean that." Anders shook his head.

"I do." The wolf declared, and the mage saw that frustrated tears were forming against his eyes, "Because if he did then I wouldn't have to worry about hurting him day in and day out!" In the silence, he continued, "I cursed him for being a mage, when it turns out I wished to be one myself. In the fade, I abandoned him for a demon's power, after spending years scorning him for having the same thing forced on him. And when he told me not to kill Hadriana, I ignored him, and then took my anger out on him for what I had done!" Fenris was crying now, in a fit of rage, and Anders could do nothing but watch in awe of it, "So yes, I do wish he loved you, because for all that you are, you're a still a better man than I will ever be!"

"So change." Anders told him, "Be the man he deserves."

"How!" The elf was still seething.

"First, stop running." The mage told him, "Then wipe your eyes, and get back in there. Stay with him tonight. Tell him you're sorry, tell him you love him, and for spirits' sake, make love to him!"

"But how can I after everything I've done?" He closed his eyes tight.

"By accepting that he forgave you for it all three years ago." Anders told him.

"Can it really be that simple?" Fenris asked.

"Yes." Anders told him.

Fenris sighed and wiped his eyes, "I'll never understand why it wasn't you."

"Because I can't give him everything." Anders told him, "I love him dearly, but my cause will always come first… He knows that."

"Then I am grateful." Fenris said dryly, and began walking back to the house. He stopped a few feet before the door and looked back at Anders.

"And… thank you," Fenris said, "For stopping me from making the same mistake again."

"That's what friends are for." Anders smiled softly, "Provided that you'll allow me to call you one."

"Yes… friend." Fenris said, "While I do not agree with you, or your methods… You have more than earned that title."

"Good, but I'm warning you, if you ever leave again-"

"I won't." Fenris smirked.

Anders smiled too, "Good."

He watched Fenris walk back inside, then looked to the stars above him with much on his mind. The day the elf had returned, he'd told Hawke that leaving was the hardest thing he'd ever done.

The mage sighed and muttered to himself, "Not half so hard as what I just did."

"Is it so awkward in there that you had to stand outside just to bare it?" He looked down from the sky to see Elena on her way back, "Really though, how is he?"

"I'm not sure, but I just talked Fenris off a ledge." He said, "I think we're friends now."

"I'm proud of you." She smiled at him, then kissed his cheek gently.

"Don't tease me like that." Anders laughed lightly, then said, "Not unless there's actually something between us."

"Oh, but there is something between us," She winked, "Her name's Isabela, and she's the jealous type." Anders shook his head, chuckling as he followed her back inside.

"Forgive me, Maker" Sebastian's voice was the first thing they heard once they were back inside, "There are so many chantry laws against this."

"Nonsense" Isabela replied, "Everyone knows the Maker has a sense of humor."

"But the law of temperance forbids me from drinking in excess."

"Then tell a better story next time and you won't have to." Isabela laughed, "Or pick an easier target."

"She called it, so drink." Varric smiled.

The prince downed another shot and shook his head violently, though he couldn't hide his grin.

"Maker's breath, we were only gone for a few minutes." Anders said, noticing a few of his companions were already on the verge of inebriation.

"Yes, I would say it's your turn Bethany, but perhaps we could let Lola and Blondie get in?" Varric winked.

"Maker yes," Bethany said, exasperated, "If I drink another you'll have to carry my sorry arse back to the Wardens."

"What are the rules?" Anders asked.

"The game is called fact or fable, you tell a story and then ask one of us whether it's true or false." The dwarf explained, "If they catch you in a lie, you have to drink. But if they guess wrong, they have to drink."

"Bullshit," Elena laughed, "I bet you haven't had to drink all night, Varric!"

"No wonder poor Merrill's so snockered." Anders chuckled to himself.

"Oh? But I feel just fine, thank you" The elf slurred.

"Yes, I have a tonic for that feeling exactly." He mused.

The two of them pulled their chairs into the circle and began.

"You first, Blondie."

"Alright, this one's for Aveline." Anders said, and he began, "At my clinic, I once met a Fereldan with an arrow stuck in his knee. He was blind drunk and swore to me that he used to be a famous adventurer, and that on his travels he saw a dragon who shouted at him. He told people this story even after he'd sobered up." Anders smiled, "Thing is, I saw him the other day, and it turns out he's one of your guards now. Took every ounce of my will not to ask him about that damned dragon."

"That can't possibly be true." Aveline laughed.

"It is actually." Anders looked to see Donnic smiling, "And what are you grinning about?"

"Because it's true, he told me that very same story the other day when we were on watch together."

"Drink up, darling." Anders winked to her, and she downed the shot that Varric handed her.

"Alright, Elena." Varric grinned like a wolf, "Your turn."

The girl thought for a moment, saw at once the oppourtunity she'd been looking for. But she couldn't take it. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she said, "Okay, mine's for Cera then."

"Oh, he didn't mention it, but you can't call on me to answer- as fate would have it." The witch said, then shrugged, "I cheat unintentionally."

'As fate would have it'? For a moment Elena wondered if the witch had read her mind.

She sighed and said, "Alright… Anders then."

"Try if you must, but you won't be getting me to drink." He laughed, "You're a terrible liar."

"There once was a young girl traveling through Fereldan, and on her journey she found herself in a beautiful forest in the middle of winter. A strange thing happened across her path: An apostate, shrinking behind a tree as he struggled to hide from something nearby." Anders' smile disappeared, and he simply stared at her blankly, lips slightly parted, "As the girl drew closer she saw a group of Templars, searching fervently. The mage they were hunting was scarcely older than she, barely a man himself. So she called out to the templars, and as she did the mage saw her. He cursed himself, thinking he'd been caught, but instead the girl shouted again, and directed the templars away."

Anders swallowed hard.

"Fact or fable?" She asked.

"Fable" The mage lied, his eyes deliberate.

"Drink." She handed him a shot, her hand trembling slightly. Her gaze shifted to Cera, who nodded so lightly that it was hardly noticeable. Elena exhaled, and Varric called on the next victim.

Upstairs, the conversation was a bit different.

"I would have accepted it, you know." Leandra sighed, "Maybe not at first, but I like Anders. He saved Bethany's life when you took her with you to the blighted Deep Roads. And that time you were stabbed in a bar fight, he was there to help then."

"I told you mother, that wasn't a bar fight." Hawke corrected her, "It was a scuffle at the docks."

"Regardless, I…" She looked at him with earnest eyes, "I can accept him, as long as he makes you happy."

"He does, mother, but…" Hawke couldn't find the words.

"But what?" She raised a brow curiously.

"There is something he loves more than me." He said, "And there is someone I love more than him."

"Who?"

"Fenris." Hawke said, and his mother's eyes grew wide, "I've always loved him. And we were together, but life got in the way, and he left."

"But he came back didn't he?" Leandra said, "He's in our dining room right now."

"Perhaps." Hawke told her, "He tried to go after you went upstairs."

"I don't understand, why would he…" Her voice trailed off, and she answered the question, "What Gamlen said then, about you and Anders." Then her gaze returned to Hawke, "Did he not know?"

"Even if he did, what Gamlen said had to have hurt him." Hawke tried to explain, "For all I know he may believe that I've lied to him."

"Then you must go after him." She said.

"Mother?" Hawke asked, surprised.

"Even if he isn't my first choice, you have to stop him." She told him, "You can't let him leave because of what Gamlen said."

A smile crossed her son's lips, "I thought you wouldn't approve because he isn't human, like us."

"Your father wasn't like me either." She shrugged, "But we loved each other. And if you want to make it work, then you have to go after him."

Hawke nodded, and went for the door.

"Though I suppose if you don't find him-"

"I will." Hawke assured her.

He took the stairs two at a time, and when he reached the bottom he scanned the room for Fenris, but there was no sign of him. Anders was there, looking unusually pale. They were all staring at him, but he didn't stop to ask why.

"Anders, did you-"

"Yes" The mage said breathlessly, then cleared his throat. Fenris had emerged with another bottle of liquor.

Hawke's body tensed up as Fenris met his gaze.

"Ooh, that gave me chills." Isabela shivered, then whispered to Elena, "Could you feel the static when they looked at each other?"

The elf moved forward and handed the bottle to Anders, who popped the lid off and took a swig straight from the bottle. He continued over to Hawke.

"You... stayed?" Hawke asked him.

"Yes." The elf said, there was but a few inches between them now, "I'm not going to run anymore. Not unless I am running with you." He exhaled, and glanced over his shoulder to Anders, "My friend made me see that."

"Your friend?" Isabela raised an eyebrow, then said teasingly, "There's blood magic at work here, I'm sure of it."

Hawke ignored her, his eyes still on Fenris, "I'm… glad." He said, and the blush on his cheeks was rather obvious.

Just then, Hawke's mother made her way down the steps. And Fenris froze.

"What did you tell her?" The elf whispered.

"Everything." He shrugged, and Fenris' eyes widened in panic.

She smiled at Fenris when she reached the bottom, then went to the table to get a chair.

"Mother?" Hawke asked.

"We're playing a game, aren't we?" She shrugged, "Unless, I'm not allowed because I'm 'old'."

"Of course not, madam." Varric nodded to her, "You're always welcome at my table."

It was well into the morning before everyone departed. Carver carried Merrill upstairs, and Elena helped Bethany up to her room before returning to the fireside to lay a blanket over Isabela's sleeping figure.

Aveline and Donnic took the guest bedroom, afraid of how it would look if they returned to the barracks at this hour.

Anders was the last to go, and Fenris watched from the stairs as he said goodbye.

Hawke embraced him gently, and thanked him for his help. Their cheeks brushed together, and Anders laid a gentle kiss on his cheek.

As he pulled away, the healer said quietly, "You have been good to me Hawke, I'll never forget that." He tried to smile, and for a moment Hawke thought he saw the glint of a tear, but then he turned to go.

Once he was gone Hawke exhaled heavily.

"He told me that you would never love him the way you love me." Fenris said, "I didn't have the heart to tell him you already did."

"It can never be." Hawke said, "I know that."

"Because of dedication to his cause?" The elf came down to stand beside him.

"Because I would give anything to keep him safe." Hawke sighed, "And where his path leads, I know I will never be able to." The mage then looked at him, "But it doesn't matter. You were the one I always wanted. No one else."

"We… have never spoken about what happened three years ago." Fenris said.

"Shall we?" Hawke said, taking his hand.

The elf followed him up the stairs, and the door shut behind them.

She was on his heels the minute he stepped out the door.

"Wait." Elena called after him and he stopped, "Why did you tell them I'd made it up? The story about the girl?"

He turned to her, "Because I desperately needed the drink."

"Anders-"

"What do you want me to say, Elena?" He snapped, "Nearly a decade I've spent looking at every face twice, because I was sure that if I ever saw you again, I would know."

Justice ached in his chest.

"You recognized me the day we met in your clinic." Elena told him, "I saw it when you looked at me."

"Yes, but until now… I'd had no idea why." Anders exhaled, "But… it matters little. You said it yourself that we can never be. And I… I'm not prepared to deal with that. Not now."

He turned to go and she followed, "So you're just going to leave?"

She grabbed his arm, and in a second he whirled, nearly throwing her against the side wall. Their lips came crashing together recklessly. After a moment they broke.

"A thousand times I've dreamt of doing that." Anders breathed, "And Maker, I've never regretted something so much in my life."

Elena simply touched her lips, and looked away as he left. But again, he stopped.

"If you knew all this time…" He tried, "Why wait until now?"

"Because until this very moment, I didn't think I could stand to dredge up the past." She said truthfully.

"Funny." Anders muttered, "Until now, I thought that I could."

He disappeared into the shadows, and Elena went back inside. She joined Isabela on the rug by the hearth, glad that the rogue was sleeping too heavily to hear her cry.

Once he returned to his clinic, the mage threw a fit. Unleashing his magic to leave scorch marks on the walls, throwing jars of salve off their shelves, and knocking over an entire crate of reagents… nothing could abate him. And finally he just collapsed; fell to his knees in the center of them room, pressed his face into his hands and began to cry.

There was only one person in the world he would give up everything for, and now he knew for certain, she wanted no part of him.

When morning came, Leandra was the first one up. She drew on a coat, surprised to see that Bethany was not in the room with her. She went down the hall, carefully opening her son's door, just a crack.

She found him asleep with the elf's arms around him, and a smile crossed her lips. Elena and Isabela were intertwined downstairs, and in the guest bedroom Aveline and Donnic were asleep together as well.

In a third bedroom she found Carver beneath the blankets of a large oak bed, and she choked down a laugh when she saw the elven girl with her head on his bare chest.

In the study she found Bethany, naked beneath a blanket that was draped over a slumbering prince as well. They resided on the rug with a couple of throw pillows around them, not particularly in use. An empty bottle of wine was on the floor close by, and Leandra shook her head in amusement. She doubted the chantry would ever hear of this.

She decided to go to the market and get some fresh things for breakfast. It had been ages since she cooked, but perhaps it wasn't too late to start again.

She envied them really, so young and carefree. Perhaps the years were wearing on her, and being alone so much was no help. But as she reached the market, a courier stopped her, and when he handed her a lush bouquet of white lilies that couldn't possibly be hers, she forgot her sadness entirely.


End file.
